Every day is a new resolution

March is the time when the new year's resolutions really start to go out of existence for most people. That is, if they even managed to keep them this long (myself included). Throughout January you see lots of ads for gyms and diet sodas and exercise machines on tv and at the store. In February, it's still kind of around. By march, it's like they never existed at all.

And I'm noticing a lot of treadmills for sale on Craigslist.

Since I've been thinking about the whole addiction thing (see yesterday's post) anyway, it's made me consider the mantra of taking things one day at a time. On one hand, it seems so depressing. Is every day going to be a constant struggle of my stomach rumbling and a yearning for cadbury mini-eggs? It's almost worth being fat just to not have that struggle in life. Surely the extra stress of being hungry all that time has got to cancel out any lowering of blood pressure from thinness, no?

But on the other hand, it's inspiring. Ok, so if I messed up today, it's a new beginning tomorrow. And I don't have to think about losing the 70 pounds I want to lose - I just have to think about getting through today without binging. If I can get through today on a healthy note, tomorrow will take care of itself, and the 70 pounds I want to lose will take care of themselves, too.

It's not so overwhelming when you take things one day at a time. All I need to think about right now is getting through today. That's manageable. Not necessarily easy, but manageable.

So I'm trying to live from a 'one day at a time' perspective today and see where that gets me.

--

I started my day going up and down our 27 steps. I was telling J that I needed little pebbles or buttons or something to carry to drop at the top so I didn't lose count because yesterday I did - lose count. So he gave me 11 sticks, which he put at the base of the stairs. Each time I went down, I took one to the top. It was kind of fun - made me feel like I was on a quest of some sort, like in a video game, to move all the sticks to the top. It gave me something else to think about besides how my lungs were burning. Then I did two extra trips - one, after all the sticks were up, to go get them and bring them back down, and then the final one up after bringing them back down. Tomorrow I'm going to go for 12 sticks and 14 times up and down. My heart rate got up to something like 155 beats per minute, so I know it's a good workout.

Yay for me!